in the city

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5-22-18 // 10:34 am

if I had an orchard, I'd work till I'm sore

NP: Fleet Foxes - "Helplessness Blues"

It was fantastic finally seeing them live at the Peabody last week.

Ever since I was kid, since I was old enough to remember things, which was a pretty early age, I've had days where I open my eyes and think to myself "I feel sad today". There might be a reason. Often there isn't one. Wake up blue. Later in life I'd come to recognize this as a manifestation of depression, of the mood disorders I've been battling my whole life. With each passing year I get better at navigating them - mitigating the worst and harnessing some of it to my advantage. Doesn't mean that feeling goes away. 38 years old and it still feels like little pangs of mysterious loss.

then / now