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11-18-00 // 8.53 pm I found smog at the end of my rainbow NP: Marillion - "Real to Reel" I'm tired of not having any money. School's a drag, I'm so sick of this acdemic game. I'd rather just work a no-nonsense job, not have to sit here and play around, trying to remember ridiculous minutae in order to get professors to give good marks. And to top it all off, I'm sitting here on a Saturday night, alone. Hinge and I were supposed to have a Kevin Smith movie marathon, but instead he went over to S.P.'s for the evening. I still don't get how their relationship works. Earlier this evening we were at the grocery store getting drinks. The clerk that we often talk to mentioned that his co-worker who's also usually there was up in St. Louis meeting a girl. Hinge says as we walk out the door "I wish I was meeting a girl in St. Louis". I reply "you already have one, and she's right here in this town". He said "yeah, I guess so". I then asked if she was out of town or something, but he responded saying "I think she's here this weekend". It's very disheartening to watch someone just fall into something great like that and then approach it so nonchalantly...you know, because I'm always left sitting here regardless of what I try to do otherwise. So here I sit, drinking a Budweiser. The bottle is cold and the beer is crisp and refreshing. I feel like I've had it with things...but despite of all that, I've decided to try to stop worrying. Whatever ends up happening, so be it. I'll try my hardest to be the best student or whatever that I can be, but regardless of the end results, I can't get worked up about it. I know I'm doing my best & working my hardest. And that's all that really matters, isn't it? I've recently gotten into "Alien Nation". You know, that Fox series from about a decade ago. The Sci-Fi network has been running the episodes and the TV movies lately, and I've been enjoying 'em immensely. I was really surprised what a presence the show's fans have online. I never would've thought it had become a cult hit like this. Of course I'm a long-time "Quantum Leap" fan, I shouldn't be so surprised...now there was a show. I'm so glad that Sci-Fi has gone back to showing five episodes a week. Could my evening suck any more than it currently does? No, I don't think so.
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