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7-25-01 // 11.01 am I don't believe in ever and I don't believe in now I'm currently experiencing a rather extended period of self-doubt and loathing. I'm attempting to deal with it in my time tested manner...which mostly involves drinking cheap lager and making an unhealthy amount of mix tapes. The Maxell people must love me. I mostly feel like when everyone else was in the ego-distribution queue, I must have been off at the shop next door rifling through the used record bins. Now I realize a burgeoning inferiority complex is pretty far down the list of 'things women find attractive', but it's all a bit of a paradox, isn't it? Girls seem to like an (excessively) confident man, but it's really hard to get confident in the first place unless girls actually take a fancy to you. The whole process just feeds on itself...producing the sad mess you find before you. Isn't (pseudo)science grand? In other news, it's freezing in here today. I'm shivering uncontrollably & my fingers are going numb. Why must the temperature in this office fluctuate so wildly? You'd think it wouldn't be that tough to keep the thermostat (wherever it may reside) set on one constant temp. How exactly the dial on my alarm clock/radio came to be set on a local light jazz station is completely beyond me. Stranger still is the fact that in two months, I've never bothered changing it to something else.
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