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9-23-03 // 11.05 am my badly strung declaration NP: Elbow - "Alseep In The Back" Tuesday morning, I'm sitting chained to my desk at work, and my left eye is all scratchy and watery. I have more meetings this afternoon. I'm getting a bit tired of them. People who insist the Velvet Underground were the "only band that ever mattered" are on crack. I haven't been out to take photos for what feels like weeks now. I have a few ideas for shoots written down, perhaps this evening I'll head out and work on 'em. Ed has offered to sell me a nice 4 megapixel digicam at a big discount, but I'm not sure I can afford to blow the money now, especially after my music binge of last weekend. 2003 has been the year that I finally realized Morrissey's "Vauxhall And I" is as good as any record he made with the Smiths. I feel blank this morning, neither high nor low. Interesting. Since it now appears that Erin will be working evenings indefinitely, it's nice that we're trying to meet up to go out for a bite or drink or whatever once or twice a week after she gets off. It's good because it adds a sense of anticipation, and going out fosters conversation and interaction, as opposed to sitting at home eating a late dinner and watching TV. The latter is needed sometimes, but it's easy to just sort of sink down quietly into your tiredness and then go to bed after an hour or two. That way it often doesn't feel like you've even seen the other person at all that day. Like I said, such is life, but I'm grateful for the "nights out", and I suspsect I will be even more so once she starts back with school in January. I'm also grateful that Erin has not only all day Friday off this week, but also Saturday evening and all day Sunday. Rock. It feels like we never have whole days off on the same days anymore. Speaking of going out with Erin, I discovered yesterday that Belle & Sebastian are scheduled to play the Pageant the first week of November. We're both very excited at the prospect, hopefully the show actually ends up happening and doesn't get the rug pulled out from under it. As part of my subscription to Salon, I get free things now and then. They're usually crappy and/or worthless, like a free audio book download. They've also started this trend of handing out free subscriptions to a puzzling range of print magazines. For example, I keep getting Mother Jones. And now, it appears that I also will be getting Wired. Two different issues have shown up in my mailbox in the past week. Hrm. On a tangent, why is Timbaland on the cover of Wired? Is he really an android? If so, why didn't anyone tell me sooner? The song Scattered Black And Whites is a pure musical expression of nostalgia. They're not even my memories in the lyrics, but they're so vivid that they make me remember my childhood. For some reason, the song makes me think of sitting with my parents in the kitchen at our old house on Pine Trail, of spring midafternoons with the lights off and pale sunlight streaming in through the window. That's pretty strong emotional resonance for a song to evoke a mood like that so strongly yet indirectly. Ah, I have work to do this morning but I don't feel like doing it. This seems to be a newly recurring theme. Tasks at work, chores at home -- I will do them slowly, but eventually. I seem to have become a bit apathetic lately. Which is strange, as I normally have zero problem getting motivated. My default frame of mind is that if there are things to do, you may as well get them over with as soon as possible.
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